If You Only Asked
by Mindswander
Summary: Thor returns to Earth after four months and Steve finds himself in a situation he never would have expected.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: Hello and welcome to my fic! This is my first one ever so be gentle with me. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!**

**Italics are Steve's thoughts.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Avengers.**

"Thor's coming back."

My head snapped up involuntarily. That was the last thing I expected Director Fury to say and it was certainly the most interesting statement out of him in weeks.

Although I was curious about this new development, I pulled my eyes from Fury's face and glanced around the table to gauge everyone else's reactions. Clearly he had all everyone's attention now. The whole team had fixed Fury with hard stares.

Fury, of course, didn't seem to notice.

"Stark," Tony cocked his head slightly at the mention of his name, "since you've been so generous about housing the Avengers in your tower, Thor will be staying here too."

Tony pursed his lips. "Well, I…"

"Pepper said it would be fine with you. You'll have to forgive me for not speaking with you directly."

We all turned to look at Tony. His expression flashed from surprise to annoyance to glowering at Fury for all he was worth. Of course he would have nothing to say where Pepper was concerned and it was simply too amusing. Bruce was smiling outright and Hawkeye smirked lightly. Even forever stone-faced Fury couldn't help the quirk of his mouth as he tried to hide his amusement at Tony trying to work out a proper reply. I hid a smile behind a scratch to my nose.

Finally Tony seemed to settle on a sentence much to his apparent chagrin. "When do we get to see the big guy?"

"He'll be here in just a moment. Pepper is dressing him in less…obvious clothing."

I heard Natasha huff out a small laugh beside me. Just then the door swung open.

"Friends! I have missed you!" Thor exclaimed as his giant frame filled the room. He was wearing a dark red sweater and black jeans that clung to his body. The sweater in particular seemed absolutely desperate in its attempt to cover his broad chest, thick arms, and taught stomach. I couldn't help the color the rose to my cheeks. _He might as well be naked._

"Tony," Pepper interjected before Thor could say more, "It seems we will need to order Thor some custom made clothes. As you can see," (_we all can see very well, thank you)_ "these simply don't work."

"Yes, yes do whatever it necessary. You seem to be doing a great job of it already," Tony answered as he fixed her with an aggravated look. Pepper merely smiled and kissed his cheek.

Looking ever like a petulant child, Tony turned his attention to Thor and the shift in expression was practically instantaneous. Mischief sparkled in his eyes.

"So big guy, how do you feel about a little soiree," Thor looked at him quizzically," a party to celebrate your return?"

"That is a fine idea, my friend."

Tony clasped his hands together. "Fantastic. Pepper, you handle settling the big guy on the floor above the Cap and I'll go about party planning. I'm the master after all." Pepper rolled her eyes and turned to address Thor.

"Thor?" Thor turned his impossibly bright blue eyes onto Pepper. "All you brought with you is what I have seen, correct?"

"Yes," he replied.

"Alright, well, I'll make sure it's put onto your floor. In fact, I'll go take care of it now." She turned on her heel to exit, but stopped just short of leaving. "Wait, are any there particular colors you'd like in your room?"

He flashed her one of his boyish grins and my stomach flipped excitedly in response. "Since I am not of your realm, I trust your judgment in this area Miss Pepper."

She favored him with a smile in return. "See you later." She turned on her heel once again and made her way out of the door. The clicking of her heels grew faint as I watched her retreat down the hallway.

Turning my attention back to my friends, from my position on one of the executive chairs I watched the others greet Thor more informally. Dr. Banner said hello in his quiet way, but soon excused himself to continue with an experiment he had been working with assurances of 'catching up' later. Tony, of course, was conspiring with Thor about a no doubt, incredibly lavish, welcome back party. Then there was Clint and Natasha who seemed especially happy to see him. I guess it is unsurprising considering how well they bonded before he left for Asgard after the whole…situation with Loki. I could hear them planning Wii lessons and promising to teach Thor more about Midgard (if his thunderous laughter here and there was anything to go by, he was quite happy with this prospect).

Soon enough however, people went back about their business leaving Thor and I very obviously alone and I…I was inexplicably nervous. I don't know why I hung back from of our circle of friends as they said hello and it certainly did not make any sense now as Thor gazed at me with the happy confidence that he so exudes at every moment. I swallowed thickly and stood.

"Thor, it is certainly good to have you back." I extended my hand for him to shake.

"A handshake, Captain Rogers? I believe us to be closer than that, are we not?"

Heat flooded my cheeks. "Err…well, yes."

"Good," he replied and pulled me into an embrace. Amazingly, despite the obviousness of this impending hug, I flushed deeper. The tips of my ears burned fiercely.

Beyond my embarrassment however, I couldn't help but notice that his body was hard _warmverywarm_ and yet I didn't find it uninviting (_I didn't?_). While that thought struck me as strange, before I could contemplate it further, Thor pulled back, but left a heavy hand on my neck. It felt incredibly intimate.

"It is good to see you again Captain Rogers," he said. His voice was quieter than I ever heard it.

"Just call me Steve, Thor. Just Steve."

"Well, then it is good to see you again Steve." He grinned at me contently.

I gave him a shaky smile and desperately hoped he couldn't feel my pulse racing beneath his fingertips.


	2. Chapter 2

Thor's party is just a lavish as I expected and I have to admit Tony has a gift. Somehow he has transformed Thor's floor into a faintly glowing display with delicious food and copious amounts of alcohol of which Tony, Bruce , Natasha and Clint had more than their fair share of. I would say Thor too, but he doesn't seem to have been affected.

While the rest of the team minus Bruce , who retired a bit ago, and Pepper and Tony, who wandered off, stand on the balcony here I am being a loner.

Again.

I can't even explain my behavior to myself. I just feel off…my stomach flutters unexpectedly and I've blushed more today than I have since all the pretty girls smiled pre-serum. _Maybe I'm sick._

Apparently, in my musings, I have been staring into my soda for too long because the next time I look up Thor is standing over me.

"Are you not enjoying yourself, Captain Rogers? You do not seem to be yourself tonight."

_Again with the Captain Rogers._

"I'm fine, Thor. No need to worry."

Thor looks me over for a moment. I feel a blush creep up the back of my neck as he extends his hand to me.

"Come join us on the balcony, Captain," he says. With just slight hesitation, I clasp the hand and he bodily lifts me off the couch. I think my feet leave the floor for a moment.

Out on the balcony, the air is cool and I involuntarily shiver. I've never been a big fan of the cold ever since I thawed out.

Placing himself on the ground next to Natasha and Clint, Thor pulls me down next to him so that I am flush against his side. "No need to be cold Captain. I have always been told I'm a natural born heater," he says while grinning.

The fact that he noticed stuns me and since I say nothing in return, he turns his head back to our drunken teammates. The two of them are giggling conspiratorially. I guess alcohol can get even those two to loosen up.

And this it how it goes. The four of sitting on the balcony having a good laugh with Natasha and Clint as open as I've ever seen them. Eventually however, the two of them stagger away to sleep off what will no doubt lead to an awesome hangover.

Once they are gone, Thor breathes deeply and rests his head on the wall behind him. His eyes are closed and I am suddenly very aware I should move away.

I don't.

We sit like this for a while until Thor seems to rumble back to life.

"Captain," he says, "You are staring." A smirk emerges on his lips.

"I…uh…" I stumble over my words like I haven't in a long while. "I…are you okay? You don't seem like the type where a party would tire you, but he we are," I say hurriedly as I gesture at our position though his eyes are not open to see. _What is wrong with me?_

"The party has not tired me, my friend. I am very happy to see you all and tonight was glorious." Thor stops after that.

I nudge his ribs to get him to continue. "Ever since I returned to my realm, it has been very stressful. The whole situation with Loki is…complicated. It has not been pleasant."

I'm silent for a beat while I observe that his mouth has set into a deep frown. This emotion on his face unsettles me.

"Well I don't know how much of a good change it will be to be here considering our troubles sometimes," I am happy to see the corners of his mouth lift at that, "but we're happy to have you."

"Thank you Captain. It is good to know," he replies while opening his eyes to smile at me. I shove down weird stirrings in my stomach to smile back.

"I am going to retire to my chambers now, Captain. Stay as long as you please." With that, Thor lifts himself from his position next to me though he bends down once to squeeze my shoulder for good measure before he goes. I follow him with my eyes until he starts to pull his sweater over his head exposing the small of his back.

I let out a breath. It is certainly good to have him back, and I hope, as I lean back the same way Thor had been moments ago, that he'll stay for a while.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: Here's the third chapter everyone! I hope you're enjoying my story and if you are, you should tell me.**

**Oh, also, I'm flying solo on this because I have no beta, but I'm trying to best to catch my errors.**

**Again, I do not own The Avengers and italics are Steve's thoughts.**

I'm pretty sure the television will combust if Clint glares at it any harder.

I turn my attention back to Thor. Steadying himself with a breath, he lets his last arrow fly. It's a perfect bullseye.

"Ha!" Thor grins so hard it almost hides his eyes. "It would seem I win again Tiny Hawk!"

Clint clenches his jaw. He is clearly a little bit annoyed with how good Thor has become at Wii archery. Thor, thoroughly unfazed by Clint's irritation, pushes him playfully causing Clint to grunt and windmill his arms to catch his balance. Out of the corner of my eye I see Natasha hide the bottom half of her face as she leans on the arm of the couch, her eyes glittering with laughter.

Recovering from the blow, Clint whips around to face Thor. His glare could melt steel, but Thor merely scrunches his nose while his chuckle bounces around the room like a slow rumble of thunder.

"Do you accept defeat, Tiny Hawk?" he asks, while flashing him a hearty grin.

Clint just glares harder, maybe hoping Thor will explode or he'll somehow learn his secret Wii magic. Soon enough however, he loses his resolve and the corner of his mouth twitches until his face splits into a lopsided grin.

"Yes, damnit!" He throws his arms up. "What the hell man? I should have never taught you. This is getting embarrassing."

Sighing dramatically, he falls back on the couch with his eyes closed. After a beat he opens one eye to gauge our reactions. We must look amused because he grumbles and falls sideways into the cushions.

Crossing the room Thor reaches to Clint and ruffles his hair affectionately.

_Stomachclenchbutwhy?_

Clint groans into the couch.

I know I didn't suspect it, but Clint has a flair for the dramatic when the situation isn't dangerous. I'm sure it's a defense mechanism to stop us from getting too close, much like Tony's sarcastic wit, but not everyone gets to experience it so at least we all have learned to relax, at least a little, around one another.

"You underestimate me my friend. I do not know why you haven't learned yet. I will conquer all things Midgard!" Thor exclaims. He turns to me and Natasha and winks. The back of my neck warms.

Clint sits up on the couch and fixes Thor with a pointed look. "You're ridiculous," he mutters.

Thor snickers and reaches for Clint's head once more. My stomach whirls violently. Clint ducks under the hand and rolls cleanly off the couch to stand. My stomach settles. _Weird_.

"Easy on touching my hair, buddy. Each strand has its place."

Thor snorts and Clint grins crookedly.

Stretching and placing his forearms atop his head Clint speaks again. "I think Natasha and I are gonna head out now. She promised we would spar before bed."

Thor waggles his eyebrows suggestively.

"I think you've been in Midgard too long, Thor" Natasha gasps out through her laugh. She pauses a moment. "Or around Tony too much."

"I vote Tony" I say. My mind certainly did not go _there_ first.

Clint and Natasha laugh lightly and make their way to the elevator.

"See you tomorrow guys" Natasha calls as she steps into the waiting car. We wave as the door slides shut.

Once they are gone Thor turns to me. "That went well."

I chuckle. "It did. But look out, Clint might get you back one day for destroying him in every game. And at archery no less…even though it's not real."

Smirking, Thor heads toward his kitchen, leans into the fridge, and grabs a water. Drinking slowly, he watches me from above the bottle. As for me, I can't help but notice his adam's apple bob prominently along his _smoothhot _throat as he swallows. Realizing that I'm staring, I cough awkwardly and turn away to scan the movie collection Tony has so generously given us to view.

"So what are we watching tonight, Thor?"

Removing the bottle from his mouth he answers. "Pick whatever you like, Captain. I'll make us some microwavable popcorn. It is truly good movie food."

Movie and popcorn sound so foreign coming off his tongue that I can't help but smile to myself as I contemplate what DVD we should watch. The DVDs Tony left for Thor and I to watch for our benefit. For our education or so I'm told.

This education of Thor and I has been happening every Thursday night since Thor's return (you'd be surprised at how few creatures decide to attack the world on a Thursday night) and I'd say our education is going quite well. We've managed to learn to operate the dvd player and Thor does exceptionally well with the microwave. This technology, like magic to me, baffles us, but between the two of us we get by. With these movies updating us on popular culture and the rest of our team filling in the rest, while not truly adapted, Thor and I don't stick out like completely obvious sore thumbs anymore. We're still rough around the edges of course. There was the time last week Thor crushed a mouse in his hand and that time last Wednesday I crushed a laptop while closing the lid.

I chuckle to myself. _We're not doing so bad._

Selecting The Dark Knight, I place the disc into the player and then go to sit on the couch. Thor joins me a moment later, sitting as close to me as when the four of us had been bunched here earlier.

"So what are we going to be viewing, Captain?"

"The Dark Knight."

"Mmm," he rumbles as we settle in the semi dark to watch the movie.

I sigh contentedly. I'm so warm and the pulse under my fingertips thumps consistently and gently. It's calming.

_Wait…a pulse?_

Flexing my fingers, I feel the hard planes of a broad chest and the indent of a collarbone.

_Oh no._

My eyes fly open and long blond hair brushes against my eyelashes. Taking in my surroundings, (_I know, oh, I already know_) I see that I'm curled up on Thor's side _warmsowarm_ with one arm resting on his chest.

"Captain," Thor's voice echoes through me, "you are awake?"

I've been caught.

Sheepishly, face burning fiercely, I extract myself from Thor's side and perch awkwardly on the edge of the couch. I can't quite make eye contact with the God though I feel his gaze upon me.

"Why?" I start, but then stop. My voice is husky so I clear my throat and start again. "Why didn't you wake me?" I still can't look at him directly.

Thor's low chuckle and lingering scrutiny, _I can't look won't look yet_, make me tremble slightly. "Captain, you are always on alert. Even when we are resting and enjoying each other's company, you are always slightly tense and ready to fight. Right now however, you were truly resting and I did not want to disturb your relaxation. It is good for you to truly be removed from your duties now and again, at least for a short while."

"Ah" is all I can manage. My heart seems to drop out of my body and simultaneously squeeze at his words. I had no idea he could see me, read me, so well. A little shiver runs down my back.

"Do not worry Captain. I doubt anyone else notices," he says, which comforts me in a way I don't expect. The vice around my heart seems to intensify.

Silence weighs heavily between us after that until I suddenly lift my head and look Thor in the eye. "Why do you do that?" I ask.

"Do what?"

"Call me Captain or Captain Rogers? Everyone else is Tony or Bruce or Natasha and even Clint gets the nickname Tiny Hawk, but with me you're so formal. Why?"

Thor furrows his brow. "I…I did not realize that I did so and I did not realize that this bothers you. I will try my best to amend my behavior Cap…Steve." He smiles at me.

Another shudder shoots through my body.

"You are cold Steve," he says, while reaching for me. "Come here." He pulls me to him so that my side is pressed to his.

Everything about him in that moment is utterly warm and inviting. I do not protest.

After a bit, while adjusting himself, he turns his head toward me and on an exhale his breathe ghosts over the curve of my neck. The tremble that had vanished a short while ago returns with a vengeance.

"You are shivering still" he whispers.

I am not, but I do not say anything as he turns me again. Once satisfied, in my final position my back is flush against his chest _itssogood_ with his arm curved around me and one hand splayed on the flat of my stomach.

My muscles jump in anticipation underneath his fingertips.

_Oh no._

"Is this better Cap…Steve?"

I nod, afraid my voice might catch if I respond.

_Oh no…oh, no._

"Good" he says.

_How did I not realize?_

"Do you know what the plan is for tomorrow, Steve?"

Thor is keeping the mood light, but I can't respond.

_Because…_

_Because…_

"Steve?"

I like Thor.

I like the God of Thunder.

I normally reserve cursing for dire circumstances, but…

_Oh Shit._


	4. Chapter 4

Everyone is staring at me now and I try my best to look apologetic. This is the fifth mug I've crushed in my grip this week and the understanding looks I had been given before seem to have taken a turn toward annoyed sighs and hard stares (from Natasha anyway), except for Thor. He has managed to look amused and properly disappointed in me at the same time.

"I'm sorry…again. I'll clean up the mess," I say while rising from my chair. Clint hands me some paper towels.

"Cap, though I can afford to buy an unlimited supply of cups, I really rather not buy that many. I'd appreciate it if you'd keep the Hulk cup smashing to a minimum," Tony says after a moment. My face heats up in embarrassment when he refuses to look away from me.

Arm still settled over Tony's shoulders, Thor taps Tony's bicep to bring his attention back to himself. This seems to snap Tony out of his reprimand of me and he resumes his conversation with the Thunder God about Mjolnir.

The little black pang of jealousy that had slithered away when all eyes were on me creeps up again to lodge in my throat as I watch Tony and Thor sink back into their conversation. I avert my eyes and excuse myself from the communal breakfast room.

Now back on my floor, I go to stand on the balcony to watch the city below and think things over. When I first admitted to myself that I liked Thor I was practically drowning in it. It was so much more intense than anything I had ever felt, even for the beautiful sweet strong Peggy. I suppose that's what happens after being in such complete denial of your body's reactions. But, despite everything, I felt at home inside the overwhelming sensation and would have happily stayed there within it until one thought pulled me up short.

I'm the leader of The Avengers.

I'm the leader of The Avengers and it is not appropriate to fraternize with a teammate. While that thought was upsetting, I couldn't deny the truth of it so I made a few promises to myself about the whole situation.

Now though, it's hilarious how poorly my promises to myself are being kept.

I promised I would not act on my feelings.

_Well okay, so that was going fine._

I promised myself that my behavior toward Thor would stay the same. I promised myself that I would not seek Thor out more than I had before. I promised myself I wouldn't let my gaze linger on him.

I promised myself I wouldn't get jealous.

_1/5. That's not very promising._

Despite this, I'm very conscious of that fact that it's Thursday and Thursday is movie night with Thor.

_I have to at least try to honor my promises now and I won't let the situation control me. I've gone through tougher things._

Still, I apparently can't help the nervous flutter of my stomach in anticipation of being alone with him tonight.

* * *

_I think I'm making them anxious._

Every few minutes while Clint, Natasha, and I are playing Xbox together, one or both of their eyes flit to me and study my face as if the answers to all of their questions are written on my skin.

The clock in the corner chimes cheerily to announce that its 11pm and I have to suppress a sigh. The part of me, the part that houses my promises with Thor, whispers to me seductively, _Thor's not here_.

My leg continues its bouncing.

Apparently that's where Clint's patience ends because he rises from the couch. "Steve, as much as I've enjoyed playing with you," his face flickers to a grimace at the half lie and then slides back to blankness, "but it's late and, you know, we have late night sparring and all."

Grabbing Natasha's arm he hauls her off the couch toward the elevator. "It's okay, Clint. You and Natasha go ahead. I'll stay and clean up."

As Natasha is pulled forcefully toward the exit, she shoots me an understanding look which baffles me. "Goodnight, Captain" she says as the door shuts.

Alone now, I go about cleaning up the remnants of our video game playing. I place the controllers in their tower, shut off the game and tv, and collect the garbage from our snacking. Bringing it into the kitchen, I place it the trash bin and go to grab a Coke out of the refrigerator. Turning around, I walk to the other side of the island counter and lean against it as I stare out the windows to the city and sip my drink.

Apparently, I'm going to wait for Thor and I feel frightfully like a jealous boyfriend doing so.

Around 1 am the elevator dings and Thor strolls onto his floor. Shame floods through me as I come to terms with how long I waited for him to return, but it's quickly wiped out as I really get a look at him once he flips the switch to one of the other lights.

Walking further into the room with a satisfied smile on his face, I see that he's wearing a blue button up that matches the color of his eyes, black jeans that hug his narrow hips, and combat boots.

_He looks delicious_.

My body jerks involuntarily.

_Wait…no, not delicious. He looks…good? That's an appropriate thought for a teammate. Right?_

I'm not allowed to pursue that thought further because Thor finally notices my presence.

"Steve?" he blinks a few times in surprise.

"Hi," I say quietly. I suddenly feel stupid.

Recovering from his surprise, a smile blooms on his lips and rather than let him truly begin to wonder why I'm here, I veer the conversation in another direction.

"So, Thor, how was your day?"

"Ah, Steve, it was a wonderful!" he booms enthusiastically. "Tony and I sparred for hours. Then, upon his suggestion, I cleansed myself and dressed in this attire he chose for me out of my wardrobe."

Thor gestures to his clothing. "It is an outstanding outfit, no?"

I nod, while giving what I hope is a convincing smile. I'm already breaking my promise to myself again as jealousy loops itself around my throat and squeezes. It practically chokes me.

_No. _

_No. Thor and Tony are teammates. They are allowed to spend as much time with each other as they want._

Focusing back in on Thor I listen to him tell the rest of the story of his day.

"After we were dressed, Tony took me a place you Midgardians call a bar and it was splendid. The ale of this realm is weaker than I anticipated, but it was satisfactory nonetheless. And it would also seem that I am a, as Tony calls it, a ladies man!" My smile falters. "Many Midgardian females approached me and wanted my affections. Tony was impressed."

A heavy weight settles on my chest and I'm pretty sure my smile has twisted itself into a frown. I don't want it to be. I want to smile and play along and be happy for him, but I can't. I sat around all night wishing he was here and he…he did not even feel the absence of my company. _I'm so stupid._

My face must register the crushing weight because Thor's smile disappears. Instead now he looks concerned…and confused.

Then realization strikes. "It is Thursday" he murmurs. He looks so ashamed of himself as a blush (_Gods blush?_) creeps over the top of his cheeks. And, in spite of everything, my heart beats frantically in my chest. I don't want him to be upset.

"Steve, I am truly sorry. I do not know how I had forgotten." He stops to take a breath. "Our ritual is important to me and I hope you can forgive my lapse in memory."

I want to laugh, but I know I'll sound hysterical if I do so instead I force myself to grin at him as I lay a hand on his forearm.

_How reckless._

"Of course I forgive you, Thor. Everyone forgets things, but I think I'm going to go to bed now." My voice sounds hollow to my own ears.

The frown on Thor's face deepens. "Goodnight, Captain."

A sound leaps from my throat to my mouth ready to explode out of my body. Whatever sound it is however, _chokedsobhystericallaugh_ is violently restrained. I won't let it escape past my tightly held lips.

Arriving back on my floor, I feel thoroughly out of control. Glancing around, I see it looks like no one lives here and I groan. I'm so utterly frustrated with myself for letting it get like this.

With a lack of better things to do, I drag myself to the shower. Once settled under the hot stream, I close my eyes and my mind whirls around thoughts of Thor with no end in sight. I almost can't take it.

But then I open my eyes and shake my head vigorously.

_You are Steve Rogers, you are from Brooklyn and you are a soldier. You will NOT let this control you._

I don't know why, but this time these statements ring truer than they did before and I feel so grounded as I shove the _ThorIlikeThor_ down in a place so far within myself I can almost ignore it.

I smile to myself.

Thor and I are _justfriends_ and everything will be fine.

**Author's note: The next chapter will be up in the next couple days or so. Thank you to all of the lovely people that have been reading my story. If you like it though, reviews will be greatly appreciated so I really know how you all are liking it. :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note: Here is chapter five, finally! Sorry it's taken me so long, but this one is longer than the others. I really hope you like it because it's my favorite yet. Again, if you're enjoying what I'm writing let me know. I really appreciate all the feedback I've gotten so far!**

**Happy reading!**

"Shenanigans. We must get up to shenanigans tonight lady and gentlemen," Tony instructs as we get closer to the club. He's somehow convinced all of us, even Bruce, to come out with him.

"We're going to show the Asgardian how Midgardians really party!" I roll my eyes. He's insufferable sometimes.

Behind me I hear Thor chuckle quietly, but he quickly speeds up, passes me, and throws an arm around Tony causing me to grit my teeth tightly.

_I'm better than this, _I reprimand myself.

And I am. I've managed to not shatter any cups, to keep blushing to a minimum, and to feel a distinct lack of jealousy over the attention Thor shows others. I have slips ups of course, like now for instance, but on the whole, I'm holding true to my promises.

_True to your promises? My subconscious scoffs. I seem to recall you curled up on Thor's side just about every time you watch movies together now…which is what? Every single night since your promise shower?_

I shush that dark voice immediately. It's all true, but I'm allowed one small comfort, am I not?

I twitch lightly.

_Am I trying to justify this to myself?_

I can practically hear my subconscious snicker in response.

Breathing harshly through my nose to banish this whole silly self-reflection, I come back into awareness inside the club. It's one of those retro trendy places or so Tony tells us. I don't have any clue what that means, but to me the design seems sleek and modern, everything I'm not quite honestly.

As we make our way through the Friday night crowd, I take inventory of the people around us. Old soldier habits die hard I guess. The first thing I can't help but notice though is how our little group draws the attention of everyone we pass. I receive my fair share of coy smiles from some beautiful ladies, but all eyes, and I mean all, seem to linger on Thor. Everyone smiles just a little bit longer, just a little bit more flirtatiously. I don't know how Thor's taking it, but if I was him, I would be distinctly overwhelmed.

Reaching our VIP room, we all fan out into the space and lean on the edge of the low railing to survey the scene before us. From where Tony has so generously placed us, we have a perfect bird's eye view of all the action below us and the extravagance of it isn't lost on me. I feel slightly uncomfortable, but I shake it off because, I mean, I'm here. Why not try to have fun?

After loitering in our room for a few minutes, I go sit on one of the pristine white couches and our group splits off into two factions, Clint, Natasha, and I and Tony, Bruce and Thor. With one last reminder that all drinks go on the Stark tab, Bruce, fidgety Bruce, who's practically glued to Tony's side, _Tony promised everything would be grand so grand if Bruce just stuck close_, follows Thor and Tony as they leave the sanctuary of our room and slip into the crowd below to "scout out the place." Scout out however, sounds suspiciously predatory, but I chase that thought out of my mind right away. I promised to leave my "stone aged sensibilities" at home.

Turning to Natasha and Clint, who are seated next to me on the couch, I study their faces to measure their level of comfort in the situation since I can't imagine they are any more comfortable than me considering their histories. Based on their body language however, they seem to range from completely placid to born to be here. Sultry smile on her face, Natasha 's legs are crossed exposing her milky white thighs from under her obscenely short black dress while she gently toes one of her stilettos (_I think that's what they're called_) on and off her foot in a rhythmic fashion. She's looks positively regal and incredibly at home.

This is her playground.

Noticing me observing her, she turns her smile on me and then grins wickedly when I swallow hard. Sometimes she's too much.

Standing up, she glances behind herself to look at us. "I'm going to get a drink," she says before sauntering, that's the only fitting word, away.

Beside me Clint barks out a laugh. "Man, those guys are doomed."

"What do you mean?" I ask quizzically.

"Heh, she's such a total shark, Cap. She'll fleece them and then disappear before they even know what happened. So, as I said, they're all doomed," he answers. From our vantage point three guys are already eating out of the palm of her hand.

"They don't even stand a chance."

Clint chuckles. "Not even close."

He and I sit in amiable silence after that, but soon enough Natasha returns with three drinks in hand. Placing one in mine, I lift the drink to my face to survey it in the dim light.

"What is it?"

"Cranberry vodka. I figured I'd start you easy," she replies coolly with a wink. "I don't want to get you drunk or anything."

I flash her a grin. "It'll take much more than this to get me drunk," I say. _Because, well...I can't get drunk at all._

I don't know if it's the way I say it or what I said, but a fire lights in her eyes.

"Challenge accepted" she retorts then tips her head back and swallows the clear liquid in her glass in one gulp. "I'll be right back."

"Tony's lucky we have a pretty girl on our team, otherwise I think he might have choked to death over the bill we're going to rack up tonight," Clint jokes once she's gone.

* * *

Throughout the night, Natasha ferries drinks to Clint and I, though mostly me as the hours wind on.

I count them.

I've had 12 drinks so far, all strong except for the first, and yet I still feel nothing though I consciously know I should. She and Clint however seem positively out of their mind. Once in a while a hysterical set of giggles will start up beside me and sometimes I even get caught up in it. I'm starting to think this whole drunk thing is more contagious than anything.

Swimmingly into my line of vision, Natasha has an absolutely devilish look on her face. "Dance with me Captain," she purrs.

Grabbing my hand she gives a tug and foolishly, because this surely can't end well, I follow her down into the sea of people.

Wedged into the mass, Natasha throws a naughty, _naughty oh god_, smile over her shoulder before starting to _move_.

I'm positively mortified. She's rubbing against me and swiveling her hips in lewd ways and I'm just absolutely frozen and blushing violently behind her.

This goes on for a while until, either sensing my hesitation or having mercy on me, she twists to face me. Taking in whatever horrified expression I must have on, she throws her head back and lets out a laugh. It's high and pleasant like a music note.

"I release you" she whispers into my ear and I can't get out of there fast enough.

Back in the safety of the VIP room, Clint and Bruce start cackling at my stricken face until they're both beat red.

Snorting uncontrollably Clint finally manages a sentence. "I told you she was a shark!" he says, then bursts into another fit of laughter.

More composed than Clint, Bruce smiles at me. "She totally took you for a ride."

A few minutes tick by.

Now calmed down significantly, Clint really looks at my scarlet face. "I hope you're not upset with her. She was just playing around" he says seriously.

"I k-know," I manage to stutter after a moment. And I do know. That dancing was just a little too much for me. I'm from the 1940's for pete's sake!

As if sensing our turn in conversation, Natasha abruptly appears beside me. "Aww Cap, I didn't embarrass you too much, did I?"

I shake my head.

"Good. You're a good guy, you know that?"

And she hugs me, h_ugs me_. I know she wouldn't in any other circumstance, but it makes me smile anyway.

Suddenly, the whole situation strikes me as strange. "Bruce," I ask "where are Tony and Thor?"

No wonder I felt weird. Bruce is up here with us, not orbiting Tony like a twitchy moon.

Upon my question Bruce rolls his eyes heavily. "Down there." He points to a group with two men and a ridiculous amount of girls.

If I was honest with myself I would say that I had been keeping tabs on this all night, but right now I'm not feeling honest. Instead, I'll say I've simply not noticed his activities. Now though, completely keyed into his whereabouts with the others, my heart flutters then contracts viciously when I see him laugh (_I can hear the rumble of it in my head_) and then rub a blonde's hair between his fingers. I don't think I quite catch the grimace that passes over my face.

Startling me, a hand lands on my shoulder and I turn to find a deviously smiling Tony peering at me from under long lashes. _How did I not see him make his way up here?_

"Well, well, well. Here are my lovely team members squirrelling away in the shelter I so generously provided them." Somewhere behind me I think I hear Bruce stifle a sigh.

"This will not do. Drink. Be merry. I don't care what you do, but do it down there. Thor's made a bunch of lovely friends."

Rather than fight him, as we are all wont to do, everyone just shakes their head and makes their way out of the room. As I go to follow, Tony's hand grips my shoulder tighter. He clearly doesn't want me to go.

"Yes?" I grind out. I don't want to get into it with him right now.

"So Steve," Tony coos, "why don't you go down there and steal your boyfriend from that gaggle of girls? I'm sure he wouldn't mind."

_Boyfriend?_

I choke on the word and the undeniable hope that filters up through my being.

"What?" I sputter.

"Oh come on now, you can tell Uncle Tony. You like our big Asgardian super hunk," he says while poking my cheek.

Shaking out from under his hand, I turn on him. "I literally have no idea what you're talking about."

That shark smile he had fixed on me up until now vanishes as he stares me down.

"You've got to me kidding me."

I look at him and shake my head feigning exasperation. _And in complete denial my inner voice whispers giddily._

Tony rolls his eyes, tips his head down, and lets out a long suffering sigh. "Are you sure, because the doe eyed kicked puppy stares, hulk cup smashing, blushing bride bit says otherwise."

Of course this makes me blush madly because it's true.

"Y-You're ridiculous," I stammer.

Tony smirks. "That wasn't a no."

"That wasn't a yes."

"But it wasn't a no" he reiterates. "Come now, we can just—"

"No."

"But it—"

"No."

"Aww Cap, but he—"

"Tony!" I exclaim and he stops, looking put out as he does so.

Running a hand over the back of my neck, I look to my left then back at him.

"I'm tired. I'm—"

"Oh, bullshit!" he huffs.

"You're not me," I counter.

"No, I'm not, but I don't have to be you to know you're just chickening out." _Bullseye._

"Again, you literally don't know what you're talking about," I say. A trickle of sweat lazy trails down the side of my neck. "I'm going to go now. Tell the others I say goodbye, would you?" I make to exit while Tony grumbles something about Captain America and thick headed chicken shit.

Out in the cooler night air, I try to clear my mind.

_Tony knows. But how does he know?_ I chuckle darkly to myself_. Does it really matter how?_ _You need to be more careful._

I'm lost in my thoughts.

Soon, much too soon in my estimation, I'm back at the tower with _TonyknowsohThorneedneedwan_t swirling around my head in a dizzying pace.

Once inside the safety of the elevator, I sigh outwardly and let my head fall back against the wall with a dull thunk. I need to decompress or something to stop the runaway train _Iwantyou_ that is my mind. Going to the club tonight was a huge mistake.

I'm back to square one.

No.

This is so much worse than square one as my brain scrambles over every glance, every touch, every moment I've spent with Thor in a breakneck pace. It culminates in a leaden weight that settles on my body as my heart constricts and practically calls his name.

I put a hand to my chest. It physically hurts.

_Suppression works well, hmmm? _My inner voices hisses_._ It's been surprising cruel tonight in a way that it hasn't been since I couldn't save all those civilians, soldiers, Bucky.

_Bucky._

The vice around my heart constricts further. I miss my best friend desperately.

Bodily forcing myself off of the elevator once it reaches the training floor, I gather one of my punching bags and lift it onto the hook. I need to work out this tension.

_You can't._

Gritting my teeth against that thought, I swing and the bag explodes.

Frozen in shock, I stare at the mess of sand around me and the ruins of its casing.

_Told you._

I press my palms into my eyes.

_I really need to talk to someone._


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note: Ahhhhhhh! All of you reviewers are making me so happy and I thank you profusely for your comments. :3**

**Anyhow, this was supposed to be the last chapter of the story, but thanks to all the reviews and my happy plot bunny, I've managed to plan out 1 or 2 more chapters after this (I'm not sure if I should drag things out further. What are your thoughts on this? Do you want more suffering Steve?)**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. There's more Thor in it as an apology for not having him around in the last one. Happy reading!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Avengers.**

The morning after going to the club, so far, is a startlingly quiet affair. Bruce is sipping his coffee, reading the newspaper, and apparently honoring our unsaid request for silence. Clint and Natasha are leaning on the table and twitching every time any unexpected noise comes up. As for me, I'm sitting here eating my stack of pancakes and suffering under Tony's glaring. I don't know what about the conversation last night made him so upset, but he is taking it out on me this morning with his eyes. The strangest part of this whole situation however is Thor. He's been shoveling in his pancake stack without looking up and that within itself is worrying. He's a notorious morning person, but today…just nothing.

Feeling angry eyes on me again I glance up from my food to see Tony stabbing his eggs with gusto.

I immediately cross him off the list of people I might talk to about my problem.

_I don't even know why I put him on in the first place._

My mind goes to Bruce next. While he is a wonderful person, we really aren't all that close. The idea of talking to him about this makes me feel strange. Bruce is out.

Clint pops into my mind next. If the immediate stomach clench is anything to go by, that's not the smartest decision. I doubt emotional talks are his forte anyway. So Clint's out.

This leaves Natasha. While she's not my first choice, Thor would be, her and I have a fondness for each other though she may deny it if asked. I guess Natasha is it.

Decision made, I wait everyone out by eating my food as slowly as possible and refilling my coffee mug four times. Eventually all the others filter out until it's just Natasha, Clint and I. Clint stands first and I shoot Natasha a look when he turns to place his plate into the sink.

"You coming, Nat?" he asks groggily. He's much worse for wear in comparison to Natasha.

"No. I think I'm gonna stay here with Cap and keep him company. He insists on being a turtle this morning."

Clint grunts then trudges off.

Once he's gone Natasha turns to me expectantly.

I just stare at her wide eyed.

"Soooo," she prompts.

"Yeah, uh," I begin eloquently and look off to my right.

"I, uh, you see, there's…" I stop and take a breath.

Minutes tick by in silence.

When I look at her face again she's glaring at me. "Listen, I don't have all day Captain. I'm not feeling…myself." That's as close as she'll get to admitting she's hungover.

I shoot her a sheepish smile and then try again.

_Start small. Keep it simple._

"Natasha, I have a problem." She nods.

"I have a problem with one of our teammates." I pause.

"And?" She's clearly impatient at this point.

"It's with Thor."

"Alright."

"I—" My throat goes dry. I can't believe I'm going to say this out loud.

Natasha seems like she's about to leave, but I hold up a hand. _Wait. Be patient._

I look down at the table top.

"I like, uh, I mean, I like Thor." I cringe expecting the worst.

When she says nothing, I glance upward to see her blinking at me. "Yeah, okay. And what about it?" she says.

I can only gape at her and she furrows her brow in apparent confusion.

Snapping my jaw shut, I try to compose a sentence. "You're…you're—"

"What? Not surprised? Well, no. Should I be?" She frowns.

I swallow loudly. _Am I that transparent?_ "Yes," I finally manage. Natasha's frown immediately morphs into a look of understanding.

"Oh you," she chuckles.

"Oh me what?"

"I can't believe you didn't think we know."

"WE?" I squawk. This is so much worse than I expected. This is awful.

"Yes, we," she confirms. "We all know of course. You're not exactly discrete in your longing. Plus, even if I had any doubts, the few times I've found you squirreled away in Thor's side basically confirmed it for me."

The urge to laugh bubbles to the surface, but I hold it in.

"It's okay," she says gently. I must look horrified. "No one cares. Tony actually finds it kind of cute."

Though I'm still utterly stunned, I shove that emotion away to examine later. I have an important question.

"What should I do?"

"What do you mean? There's nothing to do." I can hear the air quotes around 'to do'. "Just go get him."

I feel like a broken record with my stunned staring.

"Oh come on Steve!" she exclaims. Settling down she continues. "Listen, you trust me right?" I nod once. "Then trust me when I say just let him know, kiss him, whatever. I promise you, I know what I'm talking about." I blush.

She stands and comes around the table to pat my shoulder. "It'll be fine," she assures me before beginning to make her exit. I put my head in my hands.

"Cap?"

"Yes?" I turn to look at her, but she is not looking back at me.

"Don't screw this up, okay? Chances at happiness don't come along too often." Her voice is grave.

I nod then realize she can't see me. "Okay," I say and she starts moving again.

I'm left alone to think all of this over.

* * *

The next day, I'm down in the training room when I feel a presence behind me. Choosing to ignore it, I keep on punching the bag I just hung up. If the person really wants me attention they'll say something.

Exercising makes me feel better as I try to grapple with the knowledge Natasha bestowed upon me yesterday. I know she's confident that if I say something or move in on Thor he'll respond positively, but I don't know if I can risk it. He's my best friend here and the idea of screwing that up by making an advance upsets me more than I can stand. Tears prick at my eyes just thinking about it and that is what is holding me back.

_I just can't stand to lose him._

"Steve." Speak of the devil.

"Thor," I say while continuing to punch the bag. I feel like I'm talking to myself when I receive no response.

Moving into my peripheral, Thor's hand shoots out and clamps down on one of my wrists. It's not hard enough to hurt, but he certainly has my attention though I continue to look at the bag in front of me.

"Thor, I am training right now." I don't want to be short with him, but his company makes it hard to think, it makes it hard to make decisions about him.

"Steve," he repeats and it sounds suspiciously like he's pleading. Concerned now, I look up at him and I stifle a gasp. He looks truly upset with his mouth pulled into a frown and his blue eyes heartbreakingly sad.

"What's wrong?" I say tersely. I expect the worst.

"You," he answers which completely disarms me.

"What?"

"You are upset with me."

"I…no?" It comes out more like a question than I intend.

"Yes, you are. You have been avoiding me since that club Friday night." It's true I haven't seen him since Saturday morning and with how much time we spend together I suppose that is strange.

Without letting me speak he says more. "I do understand why you are upset, Steve. I told Tony not to say anything to you, but you know how he is."

I'm frozen in terror now, heart beating wildly in my chest. _He knows what Tony said?_

Thor doesn't even seem to notice my motionlessness. "I told him to leave you be and that it is not our place to force you into situations you do not like, but I saw him go up there and talk to you, no doubt in my own name, and then you left." Thor shakes his head sadly. "He seems to believe I have some special hold over you that would have convinced you to come down and speak with the group of females that had gathered. I told him I did not." That's the furthest thing from the truth, but I feel calmed down somewhat.

"So you don't know what Tony actually said to me then?"

"No," he replies, "But I apologize for however he may have slighted you in my name and for that I, we, apologize."

I severely doubt Tony actually would apologize even if he knew I was upset in this case, but I'm remarkably calmer now. _He doesn't know._

"I accept your apology." I feel slightly guilty making him think he did wrong somehow, but it's better than the alternative of him knowing. I'll make it up to him later in another way for doing this.

"Good." He flashes me a megawatt smile that makes my heart sing. "I was worried Tony had said something unforgivable."

I laugh. "I know he can be a trip sometimes, but you're safe." I pause. "Do you want to make it up to me?"

_I'm really going to have to do something nice for him now._

"Of course."

"Then let's watch a movie together later."

"Gladly, Steve. It will be my pleasure."

"Perfect. Then I will see you at," I check the time. "I will see you at 10ish."

"Great," he grins at me and makes his exit.

I can't help, but watch him go.

* * *

When I seek Thor out later he's not where I expect him to be so I call his name. I get no answer. Perplexed, I make my way deeper onto his floor until I faintly hear the beginning notes of a guitar. Following the melody, it increases in volume (though it's still soft and alluring) until I'm at the opening to his balcony. That's when I spy him, face serene, eyes closed, humming quietly as his hands glide over the beautifully crafted wood effortlessly. A pleasant warmth spreads from my core to my limbs seeing him so relaxed. A fond smile plays on my lips.

Leaning against the frame of the balcony door, I watch him and soak in the notes he spins into the air. It strikes me, as I listen, that I've heard this song before and though I loathe to really turn my attention away from the sight in front of me, I half search my memory.

_Ah Tony._

About a month ago Tony turned this on while I was hovering about in his lab (Thor was MIA). It's called "I Won't Give Up" unless I'm mistaken. He said it would be a fine counterpoint to my longing eyes. I didn't know what he meant then, but it's marginally funny now considering everything.

The song comes to an end and he holds his position. He's a picture of perfection in that moment and I hold my breath lest I disturb the scene. He must feel my eyes on him though because he shifts and looks at me.

"Hello Steve."

"Hi." My voice is soft in my reply.

"You are ready to watch a movie?"

I hesitate. "Actually…no. I think I rather hear you play," I say as I approach him. The smile he rewards me with makes my heart skip a beat.

I sit down next to him. "When, uh, how did you learn to do this?" I question.

He lets out a short laugh. "I found myself with many unoccupied hours here so I requested of Tony a few Midgardian activities, as you call them, hobbies, for me to practice. After considering my request he suggested I learn the guitar. When I inquired as to why, he said he heard me singing one morning a few days after I returned to your realm."

Thor looks thoughtful for a moment then continues. "After he said that however, he rolled his eyes and mumbled to himself something about a lady killer and making me a monster which confused me. I still sometimes do not understand all of your Midgardian terms and the double meanings you all put behind words and sentences." He shakes his head. "But despite that, I find guitar to be quite pleasant and I've been dubbed by Tony and Natasha, who caught me once, to be rather good. What is your opinion?" He inquires and he actually looks genuinely interested and…concerned.

"You are fantastic," I answer truthfully and he positively lights up.

_Maybe Natasha was right._

"Play more," I request quickly so I don't end up doing anything I regret.

He smiles and immediately begins playing again. The sounds he coaxes out of the guitar are so soothing and the lights of the city below glitter brightly. I feel no rush to do what Natasha said.

_This is just enough for the moment_ my minds hums happily and I lean into the inviting heat of Thor's side. He adjusts to accommodate me while continuing to play.

* * *

I guess I shouldn't be surprised when I wake up wedged tightly against Thor's body with a slight ache in my bottom from sitting on the concrete for too long.

Though I'm alert now, I make no effort to move. It seems like every movie night I end up in this exact position and Thor has given me a large amount of leeway to extract myself from his side. Tonight is no exception and I revel in the closeness I'm allowed. He smells so darn incredible. The scent is fresh like after a summer storm and yet spicy from the undercurrent of him that is distinctly male. I inhale deeply.

_Shit_.

Thor's chuckle starts deep in his chest rumbling me until it bursts out of his mouth.

"You are smelling me," he says through his laugh.

I pull from our embrace. "Ah, what? No," I stammer.

"You were!" he repeats completely amused.

Blushing deeply, I go to turn my head away, but he catches my chin between his thumb and forefinger effectively stopping that action.

"Do not worry," he says quietly. "You smell pleasant too."

Even though I know I can pull my face from his grasp, I can't look away from his eyes. His pupils are large and hiding my favorite blue from me, but his eyes. _His eyes_.

I don't know when it happened, but he's inches from my face now and my heart gallops in my chest. The air is charged with an electric tension.

I want to fall into it.

His lips are a hairs breath from mine, so close our exhales mix when, suddenly, I remember myself. Leaning back sharply I yank myself from his grasp, roll awkwardly then spring up to my full height.

"Thor." I sound positively breathless.

_No! No! You didn't even kiss him!_

"I-I h-have to go. It's late."

I don't even wait for his reply before I bolt.

**Author's note: Boooo hiss. I know that must be how you all feel about me right now, but I promise to make it better eventually. Just let me know your thoughts on the questions I asked in the author's note at the beginning of the chapter.**

**Also the song I put in is I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz (and I don't own it of course haha). You should give it a listen since I think it's damn cute to have Thor singing it. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note: Thank you all again for the reviews! **

**For the people that asked about Thor's eyes, haha, I'll have to go back and fix that. I wrote that at 3 in the morning and I didn't mean for his eyes to be quite that dilated (although it is true that when you see something pleasing to you your pupils do dilate). Anyway, you all really seem to be into me torturing Steve so this is the second to last chapter instead of the last and I think I did a pretty good job making his life hell, so yeah.**

**Also Saiyuri-kun, I tried to include an unsexy and awkward moment for Steve in front of Thor just for you. :) **

**Happy reading!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Avengers.**

It's 7am, but it already feels like midnight to me. I suppose this is an appropriate punishment for running from Thor like a frightened child last night.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

I slump further down onto my arms on the breakfast table.

_You had him right there, right where you wanted to be. Why did you run?_ My mind screams and I don't have an answer. I've been thinking around it in circles all night and yet I have nothing.

I sigh and try to wade out of that particular pool of thoughts_. It's time for breakfast and you've been sitting here for an hour not doing that, so do it_ my mind instructs. Going to get up from the table I open my eyes and make to stand, but freeze mid motion.

Natasha is sitting across from me, face cool and the hairs on the back of my neck stand at attention.

_When did she get here?_

Shaking myself from that thought, I stand up completely and walk to the refrigerator. "Good morning Natasha."

"Good morning Captain."

Leaning into the machine, I select eggs, orange juice, milk, and butter from the contents displayed before me. When I pull myself out, Natasha is perched on the counter and all of the hairs on my arms stand up. It's downright eerie.

"So," she says casually.

"So," I echo and place my food on the counter. I reach forward to grab a pan dangling over the sink.

"So how's Thor?" she asks. I look to her sharply, but she's inspecting her nails. Everything about her body language says this is casual, but I feel like I'm walking into a trap.

"He's well. I saw him last night." I grab a bowl and cup out of the cupboard; a fork out of the drawer.

"So you had fun with him then, yeah?"

"Sure," I answer noncommittally and crack an egg into a dish. _She doesn't need to know the truth yet._

She looks at me from the corner of her eye. "Jarvis?" she calls.

"Yes Miss Natasha?" he responds in his cool English accent. She hops off the counter.

"Jarvis, can you pull up footage of Thor and Steve from last night at around," she studies my frozen face, "From around midnight or so. Project it onto the table would you?"

"Of course Miss." He whirs softly for a few moments and then begins to project footage of us on the balcony from last night. Natasha drags me back over to the breakfast table and the video runs through everything; me waking up, me just staying there, our awkward conversation about me smelling him, us almost kissing.

Me running away.

"Jarvis, freeze it right there." It's me running out of the door and Thor's face completely blank. I can't read any emotion on it and it makes me nauseous. _What is he thinking?_

Natasha rounds on me and shoves me for all she's worth into the chair behind me. I plop down unceremoniously.

"What is that?" she hisses as she jabs her finger at the table.

"I don't know," I reply weakly. She looks away from me and runs a hand through her fiery hair.

"Steve, you…Steve! You had him right where you wanted him. No, no, correction. He had you right where you wanted to be and you ran. What the fuck?"

My reply is shaky exhale.

She growls at me, actually growls. "What did you…I told you not to…now you've" _ruined it?_ My mind supplies. _Yes, it would seem I've done a fair job at that._

She's about to say more when Tony and Thor walk in. "Good morning all," Tony says gleefully. Thor just smiles and bites into his apple. Excess juice runs over his lip and his exquisite pink tongue darts out to catch it. _Oh._

Natasha shoots me a fleetingly glare before answering. "Good morning you two. What are you up to today?"

Tony answers. "Me? Oh I'm up to the usual. Fiddling with things, making the universe a better place. Thor here though, you're going out with Sam today, aren't you?" My heart stops.

"Yes, I am, but you already know that Stark."

"So I do," he laughs.

Natasha, my saving grace at this point, asks the question I desperately want to know while I sit frozen in my chair. "When did you and this 'Sam' plan this little outing?"

"Last week, almost directly after he met the big guy. Thor makes a good impression," Tony informs us. He has the audacity to wink at me.

_So he has been planning this all along…that's good, right?_ Somehow that thought doesn't make me feel better.

Tony turns to Thor. "Well you big Asgardian super hunk, I know it's early, but let's go select your outfit for tonight. I'll make you look absolutely dashing, straight out the fairytale everyone seems to think you come from." Thor chuckles as Tony leads him away. "Goodbye my friends," Thor calls over his shoulder.

Out of sight now, Natasha turns back to me. "Well that's interesting, but I wouldn't worry."

"Okay," I manage, but my anxiety is through the roof.

* * *

The rest of Monday and the following two days after that I don't see Thor except for in short passing conversations. Based on what I gathered from Tony, begrudgingly might I add, it's because he is with Sam. My heart feels fatally close to breaking, but I do my best to ignore it since I know half of what Tony says is just to ruffle my feathers. I ignore it because I messed up and have no claim over him.

Looking at the clock, I realize it's 9:15 which is woefully late for me for on a Thursday. I roll off the bed, trot to my kitchen to grab a cup of orange juice and head downstairs to the communal breakfast room.

When I reach the room, Thor is standing over the stove watching pancakes cook in a pan.

Sensing me, he looks up and grins. "Good morning, Steve."

"Good morning, Thor." I lift my cup to my lips to take a swig of my juice and a head pops out from Thor's side. I inhale in surprise causing me to dribble the liquid down my chin. I wipe it off awkwardly.

The disembodied head walks from around Thor and stares at me exuberantly. "Oh you must be Steve! I'm Sam, Thor's friend, and it is truly a pleasure to meet you. Thor has nothing but good things to say about you." He extends his hand to me and I can only stare at it.

_Has he been here all night?_ My heart cracks just a little bit more.

Finally, when I reach out and shake it his grip is surprisingly strong. Behind Sam, Thor is grinning wildly, apparently pleased his two friends are getting along.

"Well it is nice to meet you too," I say as I go to sit at the table. Sam goes back to stand at Thor's side and jealousy ripples through me when he lays a hand on Thor's back.

"Is that one done?" Sam inquires.

"Yes," Thor responds as he slides it onto a plate.

Sam turns back to me. "Do you want any Steve?" he asks brightly. I shake my head.

Thor turns suddenly to me. "Oh! I have to go back to my floor for a moment. Would you mind entertaining Sam while I am gone?"

"Not at all," I grind out.

"I will be back shortly," Thor says as Sam pours more batter into the pan.

We're alone now and I can't quite suppress the instant dislike I've taken to the man before me. I know it is completely unfair and out of character for me, but my jealousy won't let me do anything else at the moment.

Satisfied that the pancakes are cooking properly, Sam turns around. His face is adorably, _adorably ugh_, sheepish.

"Steve, I have a question for you since you're Thor's best friend."

"Okay," I say.

A blush creeps over Sam's pale cheeks and dread floods me. "Alright, well, Thor and I have been hanging out with each other for the last few days and I really like him." I nod causally, but my whole body is tense. "Do you think," Sam giggles (_why is everything about him insufferably cute?)_ "Do you think Thor would be interested in dating me?"

I subdue an overwhelming urge to lift Sam up, take him outside, and tell him to never return. That's my first reaction. Luckily, my second is more rational, though it kills me to do it.

Question in mind, I torture myself as I really give Sam a good look. He's of medium build and 6ft tall with dark brown hair that almost guarantees silkiness to the touch. He has blue eyes, bright with intelligence, and then there's his smile which is worst of all. His smile is sweet and innocent yet somehow coy. It's the kind of smile that people dream is directed at them.

My heart cracks more, but I answer him anyway. "Well if you have chemistry I don't see why not. Where Thor is from it doesn't matter what gender his partner is."

Sam lets out the breath he clearly had been holding. "Ohhhh that's good to hear. Thor and I have plenty of chemistry."

_Thor has chemistry with everyone_ my minds snarls.

"Thank you for being so helpful Steve. I was worried." He turns back to the pancakes and slides them onto the existing stack.

"Anytime," I say, eyes stinging harshly.

Thor makes his convenient return then, saving me from either crying or saying something more to Sam to discourage him from pursuing Thor though that would be completely unfair.

Setting both plates on the table, Sam and Thor go about eating their pancakes around a lively conversation while I watch them in silence. A few times Sam's eyes flicker to me, but Thor pays me no mind. He's used to my quiet spells around him.

Sam looks at his watch suddenly. "Oh, I'm going to be late!" He exclaims as he stands up. "Forgive me for eating and running, but I really must go."

"It is okay Sam. I can clean up here."

"Alright, but I'll make it up to you," he says and with bravery I wish I had, he leans down and kisses Thor's cheek.

"I'll call you," Sam says with a slight hitch in his voice.

"Bye Sam," Thor calls and then he's gone.

The harsh stinging has returned to my eyes, but I don't even get a true moment alone with Thor to maybe say something before Tony, Clint and Natasha arrive.

"Tisk tisk tisk Thor," Tony drawls, "You didn't tell me Sam was staying over."

"He did not. He was only here for breakfast since we will not be seeing each other this weekend."

"What a pity," Tony purrs as he circles the table to squeeze my shoulder. His touch is completely unwelcome right now and I shrug off his hand.

"So, are we excited for dinner tonight or what? I promise the food will be delectable." Tony kisses his fingers and raises them into the air.

Clint, Natasha and Thor all laugh as Tony settles his hands on both of my shoulders.

"You excited Cap?"

"Of course Tony," I say, but it sounds forced. I rise from my chair.

"Well if you'll all excuse me, I'm going to go train," I mutter.

* * *

When we arrive at the restaurant hours later, I'm the first to take a seat at our table of six. Bruce sits across from me, Clint sits at the opposite end on the same side as me and Tony sits next to Bruce. This leaves two spots open and when Thor comes in, he bypasses me and goes to sit at the other end of the table next to Tony leaving Natasha to sit at my side. I distinctly feel like I'm being punished. Everything he does now feels like a punishment. I know that's irrational though because besides not seeing him too much this week, he's been no different toward me in our short interactions which is much kinder than I expected. I shouldn't be surprised though, that's one reason why I like him so much (_that it hurts_); he has an incredible sense of honor and fair play that shines through in all of his actions and I admire him for it.

So everything has been the same, except for one glaring change.

Touch.

I don't know what really even clued me into it, but going over everything from this morning made me realize Thor didn't touch me once the whole time I saw him. I'm used to small unassuming caresses, but today there was nothing and when I racked my memory of our other conversations this week, I don't recall anything either.

The loneliness that engulfs me is staggering.

Feeling lonely and irrationally slighted, I watch Tony and Thor intently as our meal wears on. Occasionally Tony sends me a glare over his shoulder, but otherwise, my true concentration on Thor isn't broken.

Fingers dance along the side of my chest between my last two ribs and a high pitched squeak sounds in my throat.

The whole table looks at me.

"I, uh—" I clear my throat and take a sip of water. My face is crimson.

"Cute, real cute," Tony teases.

Everyone resumes their respective conversations.

All eyes back to where they belong now, I slump in my chair as Natasha leans over to me. "I'm sorry Cap. I wouldn't have done that if I knew that was going to be your reaction."

"It's fine," I sigh quietly. That was awkward.

She arches her eyebrows at me. "Okay, but I was touching you for a reason." I turn curious eyes on her. "As I was going to say, you need to stop staring and pouting in Thor's general direction before Tony engages you in a conversation that won't be at all pleasant." Tony must sense we're talking about him somehow because he shoots a fleeting look over his shoulder. I smile at him and he scowls.

"Understood."

The rest of the dinner I behave myself except for a few wayward looks that Natasha corrects by stabbing me none too gently in the thigh with her fork under the table.

I think I'm going to make it out of dinner unscathed and then I hear "So Thor, you never did tell me what you and Sam did on Wednesday. So tell me," Tony all but demands.

Thor rolls his eyes and laughs at Tony's tone, but indulges him. "Sam and I went to the movie theater, then to one of your Midgardian bars and then to his flat."

Tony whistles. "Oh Thor, you naughty God, you. Tell me all the sordid details," he coos.

Thor chuckles, but doesn't correct Tony's notion as all the muscles in my back lock up.

"Fuck you Tony. Thor, what really happened?" Natasha asks.

Thor looks right at her, expression stony. "I don't kiss and tell," he responds and winks.

Both Natasha and I gape at him until she starts laughing. "You got me, you fucking bastard."

Thor breaks his serious expression and smiles cheekily.

"You son of a bitch! I'm so proud," Tony bellows, clapping Thor on the back.

"I learned from the best," he teases. Tony and Thor are beaming at each other fondly now.

"I hate to break up your little moment, you love birds," Clint jokes, "but I never did hear how you met Sam."

Bruce fields this line of questioning. "Well, Clint, Sam is physicist that I met a long time ago and when he heard I was in town, he emailed me to get together for drinks. While we were out, Tony and Thor showed up and joined us. I guess the rest is history."

"They got along beautifully from the moment they met," I hear Tony say, but then I tune it out. I don't want to hear more about how much those two get along and everything they do.

Before I know it, we're walking back to the tower (we walk everywhere for some reason). Natasha is next to me as I sulk over the idea of Sam and Thor getting along so famously.

Beside me Natasha suddenly groans and says, "You know, Tony basically asked about Sam just to fuck with you, right?"

I look at her questioningly. "While what they say is true, I guess they do get along well, that doesn't mean you're out of the running or have even been displaced at all. You don't know Thor's feelings on this. Not to mention he's only known Sam a bit over a week," she assures me.

I appreciate the sentiment, but my emotions are wavering dangerously between hope and crushing defeat.

"Natasha, I—"

"No. I don't like that tone in your voice and I don't accept it. You're _going_ to ask Thor to watch a movie with you tonight, it's Thursday after all, and you're _not_ going to take no for an answer."

"Thor!" she calls before I'm even given a chance to protest and he looks back at us. "Steve has a question for you. Come back here."

Flashing me a smug grin, she speeds up to get in line with Tony, Bruce and Clint while Thor falls back to walk next to me. I'm really embarrassed and flushed, but thankful Thor can't see it in the unreliable lighting.

"What is your question Steve?" Thor asks, inquisitive.

"It's Thursday," I start and then swallow thickly. Natasha throws a quick glance over her shoulder. _Failure is not an option_. "And, uh, I was wondering if you wanted to watch a movie tonight."

"Oh, my friend, it is late and I haven't been training properly these past few days. I would like to take a 'rain check'."

I nudge him with my elbow. "Come on Thor. We haven't even really seen each other this week. Don't you miss me?" I'm actually proud of sounding mildly cheeky.

"Of course Steve," he says gravely then throws me a smirk. "I guess I can fit you into my schedule."

I laugh. It's weird hearing him use some of our human phrases against us. "Good. I'll even let you pick the DVD."

"Alright. You will have to excuse me now, I need to complete my conversation with Tony." With that, he speeds up and, as if by some unspoken link, Natasha simultaneously drops back.

"So?" she asks once she's settled in next to me.

"It's a yes," I reply then grab my lip between my teeth to stop from smiling too hard.

She rolls her eyes, but grins nonetheless. "See? I told you."

The whole thing feels like a tiny victory and a small step toward being where I want to be with him. I'm elated.

This elation doesn't last long however, because when we actually settle down to watch the movie, rather than falling into our regular routine, Thor sits sideways with his knees pulled up forming an unconscious, or maybe conscious, barrier between us.

I spend the whole movie dejected and cold. I didn't wear enough layers by assuming I would be able to curl up with him.

Once the movie ends, I expect we'll fall into our usual routine this time by staying to talk to one another, but he manages to surprise, and crush, me again by rising.

"I am going to retire now Steve," he says. "Goodnight."

I don't want him to go. I have to fix this…whatever _this_ is.

Panicking, I reach toward him. "Please," I plead.

He turns back toward me. "Please?" he repeats, eyeing me; his face in unreadable.

Looking into his impassive eyes I am unable to speak. I don't even know what I am asking for. Am I asking him to not leave me? To not like Sam? To forget my reaction on the balcony the other night?

To love me?

_Love me?_

I truly don't know, but when I say nothing he just smiles. Nothing about it even reads sincere though because it doesn't touch his eyes. My heart jumps violently in my chest.

_Say something! Anything!_

My arm, my hand is still suspended in the air between us.

"Goodnight Steve," he says again and vanishes from my sight.

I let my arm drop.

**Author's note: *bites lip* I feel so cruel, but you know, Steve has to suffer a bit. You can't really blame Thor though, can you? It's all so unfair to him too. **

**I hope you're all not too upset with me now haha.**

**P.S.- Please review! That's why this story has been going so well...and is so much longer than I planned. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's note: So this is the last chapter my darling readers. I'm happy to see that you all have enjoyed my story so much and I hope you'll tell me how you feel when you reach the end. **

**Now onto the last words.**

"You sure I can't convince you to stay to plan it out?" Natasha is eyeing me from her couch, looking for cracks in my armor.

"No, I can do this. I, as you would say, have fucked things up enough myself, and I should be the one to fix it," I answer.

Her eyebrows shoot up. "I've never heard you curse before."

"It seemed fitting somehow."

She laughs, but her eyes shine with concern beyond her amusement. "True. Why the change of attitude though?"

"Last night…last night just wasn't the same." I run an agitated hand through my hair. "It wasn't the same and…" I trail off. The hollow smile he gave me last night floats to the surface of my mind.

"I get it," she says softly. "Go get him, tiger." She pokes my stomach.

I flash her my best confident grin though my stomach quivers and make for the stairs. An elevator ride right now would give me too much time to be stationary with my thoughts.

When I get to Thor's floor, I walk down the dark hall past the bathroom, past his bedroom. As I approach the living room I hear two voices. One definitely belongs to Thor, but the other I can't quite place. For some reason this slows me down and I end up gliding silently down the last portion of the hallway. I stop just short of its end, still partially hidden in the shadows.

Now I know who the second voice belongs to.

Sam.

My heart speeds up. _I thought they weren't going to see each other all weekend?_

Wavering between continuing forward to interrupt them and leaving in defeat, I stare at the floor in dismay.

Thor's hollow smile floats to the front of my mind again.

Decision made, I flick my eyes up in time to see Sam lean forward and claim Thor's lips.

I inhale sharply, loudly, fixated on the display before me before turning away right as my body shuts down on me. My throat is horribly tight and my eyes sting.

As the first unwanted tears slip down my cheeks, blazing hot, I hear the telltale pop of their lips separating.

I bite my lip to squash a sob.

There's a rustle behind me. "Steve?" Thor questions, concern evident in his tone.

His voice seems to reanimate me and I'm able to respond as the tears flow freely. "Oh Thor, I'm sorry I interrupted you. I'll leave now." My voice is strained under the force of trying to hold back my pain.

I put one foot forward and the next thing I'm really aware of is standing in my bedroom, muscles taught as I try to hold in sobs that threaten to tear me in half, leaving me raw and exposed in my heartache. Tears stream down my neck.

_It's over._

A tentative knock sounds on my door. "Steve?" Natasha calls.

I turn to face her and she flinches, her whole body recoiling from me. My mouths upturns slightly.

_I guess she doesn't do tears._

The image of Thor and Sam kissing assaults me suddenly and I have to swallow a sob.

"Oh Steve," she breathes, concern shining in her eyes.

I try to piece the remnants of myself back together. "Why are you here?" I croak, voice thick with tears.

"Jarvis told me you were distressed and I came to…check on you. What happened?"

I rock back on my heels and drown in the mental picture my mind pulls up. Tears still slip from the corners of my closed eyes.

When I open them to look at her again, her head is canted to the left, looking at something in my hallway. Before I even to get the chance to ask what she sees, Thor's large frame fills my doorway. Taking in my appearance, Thor's face seems to crumple and he nudges Natasha out of the way before crossing the space between us and engulfing me in his arms.

I gasp.

The contact, being so close to what I want, but can no longer have, breaks my last bit of strength and I lean into him heavily, sobs wracking my body harshly. He merely pulls me in closer and whispers calming platitudes into my hair. I cry harder, fisting my hands into his shirt.

Eventually the random patterns Thor draws into my back and the light scratch of his nails at my hairline, calms me and slows my tears until they only trickle out of my eyes in spurts every time I realize who's holding me.

Thor dislodges me from his body and walks over to lie on my bed half propped up on my headboard. "Come here," he instructs quietly. Against my better judgment I go to him and he places me flush against his body, my head on his chest. His free hand cards through my hair.

After laying in peace for a while he finally speaks. "Why are you so distraught my friend?" he asks. His voice is hushed as if someone will hear.

"Bucky," my voice hitches, "All of them. I miss them," I say. I'm surprised at how easily the lie slides out of my mouth.

"Mmm," he responds.

Because he says nothing else I focus on his heartbeat beneath my ear.

* * *

When I wake up in the morning I'm alone and it makes my heart clench viciously. Sleep has done me no good. My body is heavy with lingering heartache and I bury my head in my pillows.

_You can't stay here, _my mind prompts gently.

Reluctantly, very reluctantly, I blink my puffy eyes, stretch, and get up. I linger a moment near the edge of my bed. The idea of seeing Thor this morning makes me want to recoil, to dive back into my bed, and never come out, but I know that's useless.

_Thor._

Vision blurry, I take a few steadying breathes.

More in control of myself now, I walk to my kitchen only to realize there is nothing there for me so I head down to get breakfast.

In the communal kitchen, as I'm fishing for orange juice, a warm hand settles over the back of my neck. I lean into it before realizing my mistake.

Standing to my full height, I look up to meet Thor's blue eyes. "How are you feeling this morning Steve?" His concern magnifies my pain and I wither under his gaze.

Using grabbing a cup as an excuse, I slide gracefully from underneath his hand and smile at him though my mind's eye pulls up images of him and Sam.

_I can't be here._

"I'm much better. Thank you for last night," I say while pouring my juice.

Grabbing an apple I back away from him. "I'll see you later, okay?"

"Okay," I hear him say distantly.

* * *

The next few days I go through the motions of a routine. Get up, eat, train, eat, spend time with fellow Avengers, eat, train, shower, sleep. When I'm with the others though, this is when I try my hardest.

I try my best to be myself, to feel like myself, but occasionally they'll throw me odd looks at strange moments. Maybe my laugh is off, I don't know. The strangest part of this routine however is the menacing glares I receive from Tony wherever I go, but I just don't have the energy to figure out why.

But it's this routine, it's this semblance of normalcy that makes me feel...it makes me feel emotions beyond heartache.

Heartache I didn't know I was capable of until after he kissed Sam, until after he came to comfort me and I knew.

I'm in love with him.

I'm in love with him and it's awful.

I'm in love with him and he belongs to another.

I push my face further into the cushions in front of me before lifting myself off my couch.

Letting my feet carry me where they will, I wander until, strangely, I end up in Tony's lab as he tinkers with some object I can't even begin to be able to name. He doesn't even acknowledge my existence.

Minutes tick by and yet we've still said nothing. I can feel the air around us warping, tensing, until it's thick and charged.

Finally Tony speaks. "You don't deserve him."

"Excuse me?" I'm thrown by this statement.

"You heard me," he says while finally pulling his head up to look at me.

I can think of nothing to say in return with so I say nothing.

"Cat got your tongue?" he asks. There is an undercurrent of a snarl in his voice which baffles me.

Rounding his table with surprising speed, he comes up to crowd me.

"Do you know what irritates me the most about you Captain Self Righteous?" I involuntarily clench my jaw. "You flit around here pretending to be a goody goody by saving the world when secretly on the side you jerk people around by their loyalty to you." He's jabbing me in the chest with his pen now. "Is it fun for you, Captain? Is it fun, is it thrilling to know that at the end of the day, that despite everything, there will be someone there for you to fuck with when you realize that you're nothing more than ready made government goods?"

I snatch his wrist out of the air and hold on tight. "Do not accuse me of things that are not true Stark," I warn.

"Release me," he responds coolly, but the threat is there all the same.

We've locked eyes now, anger redoubling and feeding on anger until I can practically see a fire in his eyes. My muscles are tense expecting the moment where we tip and fall into the abyss clawing at each other in rage. Distantly, I can't even recognize what we're fighting about.

It seems we're trapped in our suspended state, my hand clamped around his wrist, both our bodies poised for a fight, rage burning in our eyes and then I see it. It's fleeting and if I had blinked I would have missed it, but it was there. Buried underneath his anger for me, concern lives, twisting and fighting to get purchase, to get a grip.

This pulls some of my anger up short. _Concern? Concern for what?_

Sensing a change in my disposition Tony eyes me warily, anger boiling just under the surface. "Wha—"

"Steve! Tony!" Bruce's voice growls. "What the hell are you doing?" I release Tony.

Gingerly rubbing at his wrist and still following me with his eyes, he yells. "Damnit, Jarvis!"

"Sorry sir, but I did not want the situation to escalate further," Jarvis replies simply.

"We had it under control," Tony mutters.

Just as I'm about the say something Bruce speaks. "Steve, will you come with me?" Those it's phrased as a question it sounds suspiciously like a command.

Turning my back on Tony, I face Bruce and follow him out.

As I trail him down the hallway, Natasha falls in step with me, but says nothing. I didn't even realize she was here.

In Bruce's lab, he leans against one of his tables and crosses his arms. The look he fixes me with makes me feel weak and childlike.

"What the hell was that back there?" he asks pointedly. He doesn't even bother beating around the bush and I appreciate that.

"I don't know." And I really don't. The whole thing was strange.

Bruce scrubs a hand over his face. "You're better than that, you know? Starting a fight with Tony for no reason? That's reckless."

"I know," I respond. A blush creeps up the back of my neck.

"I hate that you've forced my hand," he says after a minute.

I look at him quizzically as Natasha shifts at the edge of my vision.

"I wasn't going to interfere, I really wasn't. I've known something was up with you, with Thor, for a while now, but I figured you two would sort it out. Natasha assured me you would. But now it seems you haven't and you won't unless someone intervenes, so here I am."

I still don't know exactly what he's getting at and I go to say as much until he holds up his hand. "No. I don't really want to hear what you have to say right now Steve. The point I'm going to make here is this and I'll only say it once, understand?"

I nod.

"Good." Bruce takes a breath then continues. "Listen, I truly don't know what has happened between you and Thor, but whatever has happened in the last few days in particular has put both of you out of sorts. You wander around here like a specter and Thor is horribly quiet and that is downright eerie. Now, as I said, I don't care what went down, but Steve, you will fix it because things can't go on as they are. The disconnect between the two of you is bad for all of us here, but the real issue is in battle. If you two can't get your shit together we're so much weaker as a team. One of us could be killed."

It's hard to swallow past the lump in my throat and around the truth in Bruce's words.

"And Captain, if that isn't enough for you, though I'm sure it is, I'm telling you to fix this for your own personal safety in this tower." I arch an eyebrow and Bruce laughs. "I'm being serious. If you don't fix what's wrong between you and Thor soon, Tony is going to take matters into his own hands. He literally has been going on and on about all the ways he's going to make you fix it including strapping you down and seeing how much truth serum he can pump into you to make you talk." I cringe slightly because I know it's true. "Thor and him are good friends, you know," _I know_ "and I'm just suggesting, commanding really, that you fix things before I and the others can't contain him any longer."

"So you see, too much is at stake and you're going to fix this. I know it's unfair that I'm laying this all on you, but Thor's constant silence this week has been making the Other Guy restless. It's almost like he wants to come out and comfort Thor, but I don't really want to see how that goes," Bruce says while laughing wryly.

He looks thoughtful for a moment and then looks at me again. "You got this Steve?"

"Yes," I say, and though it lacks some conviction, I know I have to get this done.

Somehow.

"Good, now scoot. I have to get back to work." He turns from me and gets right down to it.

Feeling unsettled by Bruce's spontaneous talk with me and loaded with the knowledge it provided, I head out as Tony walks in.

"Captain" he says icily.

"Tony," I say and I can't help but feel how right Bruce is. My Avenger teammates' safety aside, I know if I don't do something soon Tony _is_ going to take it into his own hands and I can't see how that's going to end well.

Making my way to the elevator completely lost in thought, I almost don't notice Natasha slip into it with me. Though I expect her to say something she doesn't and we ride in silence. When the doors open on her floor she files out without a word or even a glance at me.

Just as they go to close, a hand darts through the small space forcing the doors to open again and Natasha pops her head in to look at me. The look is thoroughly unnerving.

When she doesn't say anything for longer than I can endure under his gaze I prompt her. "What?"

She blinks, looks down, then back at me. Her eyes are intense. "He didn't kiss him back. He didn't kiss him back and he came right to you just because he thought you were upset. So please, just try. Just try one more time." She disappears into the dimness of her floor leaving me wide eyed and speechless.

The elevator raises a few more floors until it stops at mine and the doors open.

But I don't get off, because the blood is rushing in my ears and my heart is pounding.

_He didn't kiss him back? He came to me? _

Bruce's monologue rises to the surface of my mind. _Fix it before Tony makes you fix it._

This is all incredibly overwhelming so I slide along the wall of the car until I'm sitting with my knees pulled to my chest.

All of the events of the day flash through my head; Tony and I, Bruce and his words, Natasha and hers. I don't even know what to think.

I let me head fall to my knees.

_Inhale 1, 2, 3,4._

_Exhale 5,6,7,8._

Picking my head up off my knees, I reach forward and press the button for Thor's floor with no plan in mind. I don't know what I'm going to say, not a damn clue, but something will come.

Whether what I say is a lie, the truth, or some tangled mess of the two remains to be seen, but I have to do something.

_Just try one more time._

Natasha's words give me strength.

Arriving at my destination I pull myself from the ground and step onto his floor. The soft sounds of a guitar flow to greet me as I search for Thor and find him perched on the smaller couch with his back to me.

Mirroring the action Thor did to me only a few days ago, I splay my hand on the back on his neck. I feel his muscles twitch minutely as he leans into it just a fraction.

"Steve," he says without looking at me. I smile inwardly knowing he can tell it's me just through touch.

"Thor," I respond.

"Mmmm," he hums sending a spike of heat right to my gut. _Wow._

This conversation is already off to a strange start and my reaction to his simple noise has thrown me off balance.

Shaking myself lightly, I let myself say the first thing that comes to mind. I have a goal, but there's no need to rush to it. "Would you like to go on a walk with me tonight? We haven't been out in a while." I squint. That certainly was not what I was expecting to say.

"Gladly," he responds while strumming lightly on his guitar. _I guess I'm going to fix things later._

Unsure of what to say next, an uncharacteristic boldness comes over me and my thumb, practically independent of my mind, slides up and down the side of Thor's neck slowly. The gesture, the whole situation strikes me as intimate. _What…?_

I withdraw my hand.

"I'll see you later then," I say as I retreat.

"Okay," he replies absently. His attention seems far away.

Smiling, I leave his floor, but it falters slightly knowing I'll have to follow through later.

* * *

A stray hair falls into my line of vision and I toss my head to the side to remove it from my sight. I exhale sharply.

The ride to Thor's floor is going slowly, much too slowly for my taste and I'm impatient. I need to talk to him.

Finally, mercifully, the bell dings signaling my arrival at Thor's.

Stepping off the car, I walk with a purpose to find him resting on his couch while playing his guitar.

As I get closer to him, in the back of my mind I appreciate the melody he's crafting, but right now I can't let that be my focus.

Rounding the couch, I plant myself firmly in front of the large man and he stops playing almost instantly as if sensing my agitation.

"Thor," I say coolly.

"Hello Natasha."

* * *

So far I haven't even attempted to bring up what I know I need to say (whatever that'll even be), but I don't want to break the ease that has fallen between us.

I look to Thor through my periphery and see that he looks peaceful thereby giving me just one more reason and one more moment not to ruin things by trying to fix things between us.

Thor slows down until he stops leaving me standing a few steps in front of him. He's gazing at the stars thoughtfully.

"You miss him, don't you? You miss Loki." I wince as Thor's face turns from serene to pinched while he keeps his gaze on the sky.

"Ah, Thor, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up," I say quickly.

He doesn't respond.

"I'm sorry," I repeat more softly.

"Do not apologize. I hope that one day I will be able to think of Loki and not have it hurt me so much, but until that time, I should not shy away from his memory. Despite what he may say and did, he was, and still is, my brother and I love him dearly."

"I completely understand." Thor finally pulls his eyes from the sky to look at me. "Though our situations aren't identical, I hope that one day I can talk about Bucky and all of the others in a way that doesn't make my heart feel like it's breaking. It gets better though, it does. It may not be perfect for me right now, as you saw the other night, but it's better than it was. You'll find your peace with Loki."

Thor looks back to the sky. "I do hope that is the case," he murmurs.

"Your Midgardian stars are so faint," he says after a moment.

I look up to the sky with him and then laugh lightly. "That is not always the case. If you go out into the country you'll see millions of them shining brightly, but the city here blots them out. I remember when I was younger…younger?" I scrunch my nose, "I remember that before I was frozen that although this was a large city, you could still see so many stars. It's amazing what 70 years has done."

Thor chuckles and I shift my eyes from the stars to his face. Now I'm even more loathe to say anything after bringing up Loki and watching him look so serenely at the stars.

Thor looks down making eye contact with me and I realize that I've been staring.

Blushing, I go to turn my head away, but he grabs my chin between thumb and forefinger. The sense of déjà vu rocks me.

Locked in this position now, we stare at each other and I can scarcely breathe.

Time passes agonizingly slow and I'm teetering on the edge of pulling away when he slides his hand from my chin across my jaw and settles it at the back of my head, fingers tangled in my hair.

Using my head and another hand he places on my shoulder, he draws me in until I'm inches from his face.

He stops.

Breath fanning over my cheeks, his gaze moves from my eyes to my lips and back. "May I?" he questions, voice husky.

Like every other time before, my voice abandons me when I need it the most. But rather than panic, this time I pick up my hands from my side, grip his waist, and pull him closer to me.

He takes this as a good enough response and closes the gap between us.

When our lips touch it's like lightning surges through my body and I whimper against his mouth. I have half a mind to know that I'll be embarrassed later, but right now I don't care.

Gripping the back of my head harder, he slides the hand on my shoulder down my side to the small of my back and presses. I have to suppress a groan.

This is so damn good. His lips are on mine and they're so warm and soft and yet slightly rough in a way I had no idea I would love so much.

I love him so much.

Too soon Thor goes to pull away and I flex my hands on his hips, making a little sound of protest in my throat. Smiling against my mouth, he indulges me by kissing me deeper for a moment _yesyes_ before nipping my bottom lip and actually pulling away.

I'm left panting softly as he looks on fondly.

He ghosts his lips over mine.

I sigh.

"Natasha says you run too much and I'm inclined to agree," he whispers.

I laugh quietly and nuzzle into the hand he moved from the back of my head to my cheek. I press a kiss to his palm.

_Wait…Natasha?_ My mind supplies slowly.

I open my mouth to ask, but he puts a finger on my lips while grinning.

Moving forward he kisses me. "Come. We must go." He flashes me one more smile before walking away leaving me staring after him until my brain catches up. I have to jog to join him.

On the walk back, which seems both intensely short and frighteningly long, I keep shooting Thor nervous glances. Despite the kisses, my mind won't stop circling the idea that this might be too good to be true and my stomach churns.

My anxiety only heightens when we enter the tower and we ride the elevator up surrounded by the silence that gripped us during our return.

The bell dings and the doors slide open.

The instant that both of my feet are firmly planted on his floor, he grabs me by the shirt and yanks me to him causing me to grunt in surprise as our lips connect. I go slack in his arms.

This time when he pulls away I'm dizzy and arousal is pooled in the pit of my stomach. He brushes his thumb over my jaw.

Suddenly, from above us we hear cheers and "HA! You owe me! Hand it over!"

Thor snorts softly and pulls me into another drugging kiss.

We'll deal with them tomorrow.

**Fin**

**Author's Note: So that's it! This is all I have for you right now and I really hope you enjoyed it. **

**Don't fret though, I have some other ideas for one shots (or sequels) based on this story bouncing around my head and while I can't promise I'll post anything soon, I hope the ideas will flesh out and let me write them down eventually.**

**Thanks for sticking with me through this! :D **


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